


Retrograde

by shinytoymercenaries



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Angst, M/M, Tumblr Ask Box Fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-28
Updated: 2016-01-28
Packaged: 2018-05-16 21:09:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,048
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5841079
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shinytoymercenaries/pseuds/shinytoymercenaries
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Felix stared up at him in confusion, “Why? Am I supposed to know you? Because I don’t.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	Retrograde

**Author's Note:**

> Angst line prompt: "You have to remember!"
> 
> The ending is open to interpretation.

It had been weeks, months, that Felix had been in his care. 

He'd found the body of his partner mangled and broken beyond comprehension at the bottom of the ravine, and dying all the same. It was doubtful Felix would survive the fall. The grenade that forced him over had done additional damage to his body, and if Felix did happen to live through this, his road to recovery would not be an easy one. Locus had spared no expense in finding doctors and providing them with medical equipment to keep Felix breathing - aptly paid for with funds from Felix's own money that the mercenary had built up over the last 10 years. The man would be angry but Locus saw it as a fitting punishment.

It would be...hard to let go with the way everything had happened. He'd expected Felix to surrender, lay down his weapon and leave quietly with him. Locus was certain they wouldn't make it off the planet unhindered, but like he'd told the simulation troopers, he was going to make things right and not by sitting in a jail cell. More importantly, he wanted...needed answers about what had happened between them.

He looked over at Felix from where he sat by the bed. The other former mercenary was still unconscious; breathing and heart rate slow as ever. The oxygen mask he wore clouded up whenever Felix breathed out in a steady rhythm.

His own head was starting to hurt and he soon craved rest of his own so Locus stood up and leaned over the bed, brushing a piece of fading orange hair away from Felix's forehead. Felix’s normal hairstyle had been impossible to maintain. Now, Felix's hair was short and nondescript, all of his piercings had been removed, and even some of his tattoos were no longer visible due to the lacerations and burns his skin had received through the suit. All in all, Felix looked like an entirely different person. But that didn't change how Locus felt...not at all.

Locus leaned over further and kissed Felix's forehead around the bandage, pulling back to see Felix's eyes half-lidded...but open and staring at him. It took everything in him not to grab Felix or hug him out of fear of hurting him, but Felix was awake! For the first time since he'd...

"What are you doing?" he managed weakly, voice holding none of the usual spark that Locus had grown accustomed to. His voice was innocent...almost scared.

"I'm sorry, I just...you're alive and awake...I'm sorry." Locus paused to compose himself, something he rarely did. He was somewhere between excited and ill. His emotional state was stuck in a game of permanent tug of war over whether to be happy or to be angry with the much smaller man that lay before him. There would be time to ask questions later though.

"No, I mean...why did you do that?" Felix asked again, tone level and curious. Strangely, there was no malice or hatred to be found. Many a time had Locus envisioned Felix waking up, cursing him out or telling him to ‘leave him the fuck alone’ but never in his life would he have imagined this softer version of Felix. 

“It was just a kiss...you ask me to do it all the time.” Locus replied as he sat back down, a little put off by Felix’s question. A part of him, the part that wanted to settle things with Felix and put it behind them, had figured Felix would have enjoyed that. Thinking on it now, Locus wasn't even sure if the smaller man knew why he'd done what he did at the Communications Tower.

“But...I don't even know you.” Felix announced blankly, the tiniest shake of his head accompanying it from where he still lay.

“Felix… I'm not in the mood for jokes.” Locus couldn't believe that even now his partner was trying to make jokes. Even on the brink of death, the other mercenary still had the gall and audacity to joke with him. At any other time, Locus might have seen this as part of Felix’s charm...but not now.

“Um, I'm not joking. I don't know who you are?” the smaller merc responded with the usual agitation coming back into his voice. Felix was currently immobile for the most part but his words were alive and harsh.

“Felix, are you saying...you don't remember me?” Locus could feel his blood run cold. This couldn't be happening. This happened in movies or books, not in real life...not to them. If Felix truly didn't remember him, then Locus would never get the answers he was looking for. Enraged, Locus shot up from his chair, knocking it to the floor behind him, and went to lean over Felix’s bed. He grabbed the headboard, in lieu of Felix’s body, so tightly that the lacquered wood could have splintered beneath his touch, “You have to remember!” he practically barked before his partner could speak.

Felix stared up at him in confusion, “Why? Am I supposed to know you? Because I don't.”

Locus’s harsh and angry gaze softened, his pupils had practically been vibrating from the intensity. “What...what do you remember?” Locus asked with his voice low.

Felix seemed to think for a moment, “...Nothing.” the man admittedly somberly as his own eyes drifted the left then to the right then back up to Locus. “Who am I? What’s going on?”

Felix was always an excellent actor but there was no way anyone could put on an act this good, not even Felix. But amnesia? The doctors hadn't even mentioned the possibility of this happening.

Locus’s grip softened then, his hand slipping off the headboard as he moved to stand up straight. His mind was firing off too many shots right now, he wasn't sure what to do. Should he help Felix remember? Force the harsh memories of his crimes back onto Felix so that the mercenary would know what’s he done...what he did to Locus? He wanted answers. But that part of Locus, that nagging part that still wanted to call this person ‘ _his_ ’ spoke up before he realized,

“Everything’s going to be alright, Felix...I’m going to make things right.”

**Author's Note:**

> So originally I wanted to end this with Locus calling Felix 'David', to imply that maybe Locus is reshaping Felix's personality to be like someone else or Wash's but...locington is such a huge trigger for me that I couldn't go through with writing it so yeah...I picked a safe ending. Then I realized there's another story out there who ends almost exactly like this. I tried. orz 
> 
> And remember, the ending is meant to be open so interpret it anyway you want.


End file.
